1. New Orleans Saints 13-3
I must say, good pick!
The Saints were THIS CLOSE to a Super Bowl last year. They had the most complete and well rounded roster. It is in tact, locked, and loaded for 2019.
2. Kansas City Chiefs 12-4
The Chiefs don’t have the second best record in the league, but they’re right up there with the elites. Another nice prediction, P Dub.
Their opponents know what’s coming, but then again THEY DON’T! Is anybody gonna figure out how to stop Mahomes this year? Best they can do is try to contain him!
3. New England Patriots 12-4
The luxury of playing in an easy division and not being all that good is, you get a 12 and 4 record. But, anything can happen in the second season. They’re in the thick of it again.
Seriously? Again with these guys? I mean, Josh Gordon is having more off the field problems. Their roster isn’t that deep anyway. Gronk is done. Julian just ain’t that good, is he? Still, are you gonna bet against them? They make it look easy.
4. Los Angeles Rams 9-7
Big disappointment here. I guess I thought their defense would keep them in the hunt. They sucked though. Baaaaaad pick.
P Double thinks the Rams were lucky to be there last year. They’ll need some luck this year too. But, they’ll be better than last year and still in the hunt. Keep in mind, a number 4 ranking puts you in the conference championship and THIS CLOSE to the Super Bowl.
5. Seattle Seahawks 11-5
A great season and an easy pick to get right. Right on!
Clowney. That is all.
6. Dallas Cowboys 8-8
Sheesus f*$%^ %#@!*&$*%@! ##@!&!!! What a horrible season and terrible pick. Turns out Zeke delivered. Problem is, nobody else did.
Hey now! Hang on! Don’t go anywhere! Come back. Keep reading.
What we have here is a volatile situation. A good old fashioned Mexican standoff. On one side of the border is Jerry Jones. On the other side is Ezekiel Elliot. At stake? The entire season! If these two cowboys can work this out, P Double is looking for the big star in the Super Bowl. If they don’t, it could be a super tank!
7. Los Angeles Chargers 5-11
What in the blue and gold fuck happened to this team??? Baaaaad pick!
Did you know that Philip Rivers has started every game since 2006? Let’s see… 12 times 16 equals 192. Plus, they’ve had a few playoff appearances in there. Some people see this group in the Super Bowl. I can see why, but P Double don’t see it that way.
8. Chicago Bears 8-8
Another stink bomb of a season. Waisted opportunity. Waisted pick.
Who here doesn’t love Khalil Mack? I dare you to say so! This 2019 version of the Bears is the definition of smash mouth football. And if you’re looking for the daring gunslinger to lead an offense, Trubisky is your guy. This will be a fun year for Bears fans.
9. Baltimore Ravens 14-2
Great team. Best record in the league. Prolly the biggest surprise. Wrong pick, but not bad.
The Ravens have the luxury of playing in a shit division. Lamar Jackson has a good season under his belt and Mark Ingram brings experience. Their defense is super stingy. Their schedule includes tough games against New England, KC, Seattle, and the Rams. But the rest is pretty soft. They have a good chance of rolling into the playoffs with a very good record.
10. Tennessee Titans 9-7
Hey! Not a bad pick. Titans are dangerous and on their way up.
This is my dark horse pick. Everybody has them in the bottom half. But look for a break out season from this squad.
11. Philadelphia Eagles 9-7
I nailed this one.
With a different QB they get a much higher rank.
12. Carolina Panthers 5-11
Well, Cam didn’t get it together and the Panthers tanked.
C’mon, Cam!! Get it together and show this league what you can do.
13. Houston Texans 10-6
Houston did better than I predicted. My description was pretty accurate. They are on the rise.
What a great young team! They need a good solid season in 2019 and P Double predicts they’re going places in 2020.
14. Jacksonville Jaguars 6-10
The obvious answer to my Nick Foles question – NO!
Can Nick Foles and the offense compliment one of the league’s best defenses? If the answer is yes, 2019 is a big turn around for this team.
15. Indianapolis Colts 7-9
Colts hung in tough without their franchise QB. But, they were right around the middle of the pack as I predicted.
If it weren’t for bad luck, the Colts would have no luck at all. Tough situation for Andrew and the team.
16. Arizona Cardinals 5-10-1
Meh. Didn’t really see much from this offense.
What the heck! Kyler Murray looked great in the preseason. Let’s say he’s gonna catch a few teams off guard with an offense built for speed.
17. Minnesota Vikings 10-6
I got this very wrong. I didn’t account for Dalvin Cook’s great season AND that Kirk Cousins can actually be an NFL quarterback. I must say, he doesn’t suck. Good job, Kirk.
We enter the bottom half. This is where things get uninteresting.
18. Atlanta Falcons 7-9
Was I right, or was I right? All I can say is I’m glad I’m not a Falcon’s fan. It has to be frustrating watching such a talented team be so mediocre. Wait. How bout them Cowboys.
The Falcons really should be ranked way higher than this. But, they should have done great last year. They were 7 and 9. They have a TOUGH schedule. You go through it and tell me where they get more than 8 wins. You can’t!
19. Green Bay Packers 13-3
Ok. This pick here makes me look like a real dummy. DAYUM!!
I like Aaron Rodgers and his new puppet, Matt LaFleur. I really do. But, uh… they just ain’t gonna do shit. End of story.
20. San Francisco 49ers 13-3
And this pick? I’m an idiot. In my defense, who knew? I mean, everything went right for this team. It has been a great season for this 49er squad.
This was a team on the rise when disaster struck. Their schedule starts out pretty soft too. Look for 6 or 7 wins. That’s better than 4. Quite a bit.
21. Cleveland Browns 6-10
I got this one right. Glad I didn’t get that coaching job.
What’s that one TV show where they take an old beat up classic car and renovate it with all new shiny parts? Doesn’t matter. This team is untested. Talk to me when you get some double you’s.
22. Denver Broncos 7-9
Denver came on a little at the end of the season and finished a little ahead of expectations. Maybe they can build on this year.
They gotta go SOMEWHERE on this list. 22 seems like a good spot.
23. Pittsburgh Steelers 8-8
Pittsburgh finished a little better than I predicted. That’s a testament to Tomlin and the rest of the guys that laced em up and put in the effort.
Too bad for Mike Tomlin. He’s been a class act. But this is the year Big Ben’s personality shines through and we get to see why everybody wants outta Pittsburgh. Wins solve a lot of problems and this team won’t be havin’ many – wins that is.
24. New York Giants 4-12
Boy, I nailed this one.
How is it that Saquon Barkley is so good and the offensive line is so bad? It’s a mystery.
25. Detroit Lions 3-12-1
Another good pick here. Like fish in a barrel.
Boy, I tell ya! That Matt Stafford sure has a great arm.
26. Cincinnati Bengals 2-14
Sheesh! I pick em 26th and they still disappoint. Bungels are hurting.
New coach, old QB. Nothing to see here.
27. Washington Redskins 3-13
Bam! Got another one.
I’m just tickled pink to see these guys still dwelling in the cellar. Keep trying, guys. Go Cowboys!
28. New York Jets 7-9
Man! The Jets were terrible. Where did they get 7 wins?? Wait. How bout them Cowboys.
Le’Veon Bell didn’t even play last year. Neither did Sam Darnold. Haha!
29. Buffalo Bills 10-6
Huh??? I don’t even know what to say. Obviously, this team outperformed expectations in a big way. Well done, Bills. And yes, they beat them Cowboys.
I wish I knew how to spell that farting sound.
30. Tampa Bay Buccaneers 7-9
Since they were 7-9 I’d say I got this one wrong. But, this was not a very good team.
They’re sinking.
31. Oakland Raiders 7-9
Wrong!! Is Gruden earning his check? Does he weather the storm? Let’s see what 2020 has in store.
How do I get a job coaching one of these teams? Where can I fill out an app? Maybe I could even be a GM one day!
32. Miami Dolphins 5-11
They didn’t have the worst record, but this team sucked. Well, except that last game against the Patriots!!
We made it to the bottom of the ocean.